Steps to Overcome Insecurity

Photo by Abigail Keenan

Insecurity is something we deal with in our daily lives, whether we like it or not. Even the most confident, most incredible person has doubts. We worry about our capacity to do something, about how we look, what others think about us, if they like us, if we fit in, and if we are good enough. And this applies to every aspect of our life -family, friendships, work. That feeling of being inadequate and unworthy impacts our emotional life and our way of interacting with others. Some may try to overcome these feelings, while others may hide them and put on a mask.

But Insecurity holds you back from being who you really are. It keeps you in a stronghold of fear and anxiety.

Insecurity comes from not knowing who you are, your value, and worth. It also comes from continually comparing yourself to others, your weaknesses to others’ strengths, your failures to others’ successes. Eventually, you try to live your life to be validated and accepted by others. But it shouldn’t be like that.

You can choose to take steps towards how you feel about yourself and overcome those insecurities.

  1. First, recognize and admit that you feel insecure. Then identify those fears, asking yourself, “why do I feel this?”, “Where does it come from?” so you can work on them. Be honest with yourself.

  2. Turn to the one who created you, God. He knows you more than anyone else. Ask Him to help you and reveal to you the causes of your insecurities. He will guide you.

  3. Your worth and value come from God.  Everything God created was very good. You have been made in His image and been blessed by Him (Genesis 1:26-28). Even the hairs on your head are numbered (Luke 12:7) Choose to believe what He says about you and don’t let people’s judgment define who you are. They will always have an opinion about you whether you like it or not, and they can be fickle. So, don’t rely on them to validate you.

  4. Feed on God’s love for you. You are dearly loved. You are His beloved. (Colossians 3:12 ESV) His love is unconditional, and He is on your side. He has created you in an amazing and wonderful way. (Psalm 139:13-15). Confess it daily. Apply God’s truth to your life, and use the scriptures to counter the lies you believe about yourself.

  5. Forgive and be kind to yourself. If you are a perfectionist, you may have realized that sometimes life doesn’t go as planned, and some things just go wrong. Rather than beating you up, and focus on the wrong things, let go, learn a lesson and be grateful for the good ones. Take into account everything that you do well, even the small ones.

  6. Find your purpose in life. God made you for a reason. You were not created to be like everybody else. So, find what you love doing, what gives you joy and satisfaction.

  7. Put a stop to the negative thoughts and emotions that crop up. Don’t dwell on them and let them take root in your heart. Philippians 4:8, NLT says, “Fix your thoughts on what is true, honorable, right, pure, and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” So, every day, choose your thoughts carefully.

  8. Be with positive people. They affect your mental and emotional well-being. They will encourage and support you.

It is ok to feel insecure. Nevertheless, you have the choice to either confront and overcome your Insecurity or remain passive and let it control you. It is an ongoing process and a daily battle. Yet, deciding to work on it will free you and help you become the person you were created to be.

If you would like someone alongside to help you navigate through your insecurities, I’d love to connect with you. Feel free to contact me. (Cindy@anewforpurpose.com)

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